Four Rocks to Grasp in Life

by Alex Blackwell @ TheBridgeMaker

“They paved paradise and put up a parking lot. With a pink hotel, a boutique, and a swinging hot spot. Don’t it always seem to go. That you don’t know what you got until it’s gone.” - Joni Mitchell

The coffee shop a few blocks from my house recently closed. On nights when I wanted to have a couple of hours to get some writing done, I would pack-up my laptop and head to this inspirational sanctuary. It never really occurred to me I would arrive one night and find it closed.

Likewise, it’s unsettling when, for as long as we can remember, we drive past the old farm house sitting on land covered with loblolly pines and oak tress only to look over one day from the car window and see it gone. Where a graceful, almost majestic home once stood has now been interrupted by earth movers and dump trucks. Our paradise has been deferred and we are uncertain of its new location.

Moments like these sting. It can feel like getting slapped in the face when you are not expecting it. The reality of knowing what we have today can be gone tomorrow can feel very harsh and uncomfortable.

Most of us like routine; we like the certainty and comfort of doing the same things each day and with the same people. This gives us a secure foundation for the times when we find the inspiration to try something new.

Living a full life takes a measure of risk and it does take courage. Sometimes having a rock to grasp when we make the decision to walk out of our comfort zones gives us the firm footing we need to go forward.

We hope the rocks will be readily available when we encounter turbulence along the way. Rocks are placed all around us. We just need to remember to look for them.

The Rock of Passion

Living a life of passion is living a life of meaning. Passion allows you to follow your heart’s desire without needing the approval or consent of others. Your passion is your centering agent and your soul’s compass. It will tell you when you are veering off course and it will tell you when the path you about to go down doesn’t help get you closer to your life’s purpose.

The passion rock helps you celebrate your uniqueness and value. When your self confidence is eroding and the thought of giving up is becoming the more likely choice, grasp the rock of passion and it will keep other people or difficult circumstances from sweeping you away.

Just like you have a genetic strand of DNA that determines the color of your eyes, you also have been given a divine strand of DNA that has predisposed you for a specific life purpose. Your passion will not betray you from living this purpose. This is the rock.

The Rock of Forgiveness

What happened in the past must stay in the past. It doesn’t define your value then, or now. The rock of forgiveness gives you freedom and helps you find the courage to live in the here and now.

To be clear, forgiveness is a gift you give to yourself; not to the person requesting forgiveness. Forgiving, and letting go of the anger, frees your soul to be able to look ahead and to dream of the things yet to come in your life.

If self-forgiveness is needed, it works the same way. Let it go, whatever it is, and move forward. Learn from the past, but don’t stay there. Allow forgiveness to be a rock in your life and you will find mercy leads to clarity, and clarity leads to inspirational living.


The Rock of Surrender

Sometimes when we want something so much we find it difficult to focus on anything else. We try; we work; we try some more; we work even harder and still nothing.

Frustration and doubt seep in and we begin to loose our patience and faith. We begin to listen to other people and doubt our now motives, or even our sanity. However, if the thing you are working so hard to achieve is aligned with your life’s purpose and is the basis for your passion, then it’s not a matter of if, only when it will be delivered to you.

During these difficult times is when you can fall back to the rock of surrender. This rock may feel like the hardest to find because true surrendering can be one of the more difficult things to do.

Think of surrendering like asking for help. You are summoning up all of your courage and faith and turning it all over to something that exists beyond you. You must then trust the divine DNA that has been placed inside of you, and wait.

The Rock of Hope

The largest rock, with perfectly- sized notches on all sides just right for human hands, is hope.

Hope is what we see when the lights are tuned off in our coffee shops when we expect them to be on and inviting us to come inside for a little comfort. We see hope in the broken earth that once supported an old farm house full beauty and grace.

We begin to see hope in ourselves when we find the will to live our passion and the mercy to forgive those who may have kept us from it in the past. We feel our lives becoming a part of something larger when we surrender and ask for a little help – for a little more hope. The sting of unwanted change that burns our face with its harsh reality is soothed and kissed by hope.

We reach down to find our rock. We grasp it tightly at first. When the burning stops we let go. We are ready to move on, again.

Elsewhere

Jonathan Mead of Illuminated Mind has just released a wonderful new eBook, Reclaim Your Dreams: An Uncommon Guide to Living on Your Own Terms.

The eBook presents many valuable lessons on how to get our dreams back on track. These touched me the most:

Define Your Dreams. Dreams are fickle creatures and can be hard to tie down, but with a little effort you can do it. Identifying is the first step on the way to achieving and this book will give you the tools to do just that.

Overcome Uncertainty. You probably wonder at some level whether dreams are practical or just ridiculous. You may not necessarily doubt the dream itself, but the uncertainty that comes with working towards it. You fear your limitations. You fear your weaknesses. Dreams are possible and Reclaim Your Dreams will show you step by step just how to make them take root in the world.

Wake Up Happy. While there are the elusive few like yourself who dare to dream, there are others who would seek to bring you down. You’ll learn how to overcome the naysayers and how to start being excited about your life again.

and about "the way" we love...

How to Love Consciously

by Alex Blackwell @ the BridgeMaker


The way to love anything is to realize that it might be lost.” Gilbert Chesterton

Knowing how someone wants to be loved and then providing that love are two separate things. Sometimes marriages and other relationships end because either one person does not understand how to meet the needs of the other; or one partner refuses to meet the needs of the other.

To love consciously is a choice. Mary Beth and I often say being married is very similar to having another full-time job – you get out of it what you put into it.

Our marriage is like a savings account. My wife and I make deposits into it never expecting we may need to make a withdrawal. However, when we do request a withdrawal there are no associated penalties.

Yes, we argue over the temperature in the car or who really forgot to feed the dog, but when it really matters; when it really counts, we make the consciousness choice to give each other the love that is requested and needed.

With over 23 years of marriage under our belts, we have found the following strategies work best to love intentionally; to love authentically and to love consciously.

Show Appreciation
A simple “thank you” in response to a trivial or ordinary item can make a significant difference. It only takes a few short moments to utter these two words, but the impact can be felt for a very long time.

Showing gratitude is also the best strategy for ensuring the things you are most grateful for continue to happen. When we stop and tell our partners what we are grateful for, we are also telling the Universe. By making the effort, the conscious decision, to express our thanks we are in a better position of receiving more of it in the future.

If you want your partner to be grateful, it starts by you showing gratitude, first.

Be Happy, Not Right
Here’s a question for you, “Would you rather be right, or happy?” Too often our pride and egos can keep us from enjoying intimate relationships. We stew over what we think are injustices, but are perhaps only misunderstandings.

We carry grudges and do not show enough grace, passion or forgiveness to the person we care most about. Our need to be right can overshadow our need to receive, and give, love.

Take a look at what your pride is costing you. If intimacy is strained and the relationship is off track you may want to reconsider the value of your anger or self righteousness. Here’s the thing: You may be right in the argument although you partner thinks otherwise, but you will never be wrong when you put your partner first. Happiness always feels better than vindication.


No Day But Today
What would you say to your partner if you knew this was the last day you would be together? Would you complain about the television being too loud, or would you remind your partner of their value and significance?

Life does have an expiration date. This isn’t meant to be a downer – just a reality we all share. It’s what you do with this information that will make the difference. While it’s very difficult to sustain a high-level of connection and passion on a day-to-day basis, there are some simple things you can do to convey your partner’s importance to let them know they are important today:

Kiss your mate at least twice a day
Leave a quick note just to say “hi,” or “I love you”
Never do anything you wouldn’t want your partner to know
Be fully present when they need to talk or share something important
Make the effort to spend some time together each day
Give a compliment
Make your partner feel important
Smile
No Judgments
Judgments are often times rooted in perception, not reality. Judgments are also a piece of how you see the world, not the way the world, or in this case your partner, actually exists.

The harm with judgments is resentment and anger are typically the outcomes – not the change that is expected. When a judgment is made, there is an implied belief the behavior or trait being judged should be corrected. However, the person receiving the judgment does not always share the same expectation.

As a result, communication is impaired, connection is deteriorated and conflict ensues. To love deliberately and consciously requires loving your partner with a different filter – a cleaner filter that does not have the residue of past containments.

Be Aware of Your Own Thoughts & Feelings
Loving authentically is dependent on loving yourself, first. Before you share love, and share yourself with someone, it is important to beware of what you want. Reality suggests, however, we fall in love and begin relationships before we have a clear idea of our own true feelings.

When this happens, there is still plenty of time to discover your needs – this is called growth. Give yourself opportunities outside of the relationship. Build friendships and pursue interests on your own.

A good relationship exists when both people can live without the other, but choose to be together. A relationship built on a foundation of sharing different interests cultivates more life and depth into it.

You own your thoughts and feelings. These make you unique and keep you grounded with who you really are or growing to become. By doing so, you are in a much better position to love freely and honestly. Nature has a way of taking care of those things we put the most energy in and want to grow even stronger.

Loving Consciously
The power of love extends its reach when we will love intentionally. Real love, authentic love, springs to life and is sustained when we make the choice to feed it with our deliberate passion. Our souls are nourished when our partners realize we know how to love them.

There will be a day when I no longer share this life with my wife. When that day arrives, my hope is she will know my intent was to discover exactly what she wanted and my conscious choice was to give her more of that.

10 Wonderful Gifts that Give Us Hope

By Alex Blackwell @ theBridgeMaker

“Once you choose hope, anything’s possible.” - Christopher Reeve

I love the Christmas season. The next several days will be filled with excitement as Mary Beth and I finish our Christmas shopping and make final preparations to extend the Christmas spirit into our home. Gifts need to be wrapped and shipped; several holiday parties are scheduled, and our favorite Christmas treats are waiting to be prepared, and eaten, with joyful gusto.

Through the busyness of our lives, though, it can be easy to forget why we celebrate Christmas in the first place. We buy the gifts, decorate our homes and reach out to family and friends not because there is an obligation to do so, but because by perpetuating the Christmas tradition, year-after-year, we are saying it matters to keep this time of year sacred.

Christmas provides us with the opportunity to see the gifts of hope that are still in style; are in the perfect color and just the right size to wear all year long.

However, it can be easy to be hopeless right now. The world is far from perfect. The instability of our economy and the recent events in Mumbai has some of us scratching our heads and wondering why we even bother to keep hope alive.

For me, the reason is clear – hope is a wonderful gift I have been given that helps me see the goodness that exists all around me and in me. Hope sustains my belief that no matter what happens, incredible value and grace can be found in the experience.

Over the course of my lifetime, I have received these wonderful gifts that give me hope. I share them from my heart to yours:

When we understand our lives count for something. We have a purpose for being here. It may be to become a community or business leader, a scientist responsible for finding an important cure to a disease, or to be a loving spouse and parent. It really doesn’t matter what we do. What matters is how we take the gifts we have been given and use them to inspire and care for others. When we do this, it’s clear our lives do indeed count for something.

Refusing temptation. The enemy will taunt us and lure us into believing what feels good is good. When we cover our eyes, shield our hearts and refrain from doing something that we wouldn’t want those closest to us to know about, we breathe new-found hope into our souls and remind ourselves of the dignity and self-respect that lives there.

Finding the courage to start-over. Starting over again is not a sign of defeat; it’s a sign of hope. It signifies where we were heading was not the proper destination, but we still have the energy and passion to keep going – albeit in a different direction. Staring over recharges our spirit and keeps us moving forward in life.
When personal satisfaction trumps instant gratification. I have been tempted by the over-use of alcohol for as long as I can remember. When I find myself alone, my desire to drink, and drink to excess, increases.

Recently my wife and daughter went out of town for a long weekend. The temptation was strong, but the need to stay sober was surprisingly stronger. There’s no question I would have enjoyed the temporary effects of the alcohol, but self-care intercepted the temptation and brought with it an even more stimulating feeling of personal satisfaction.

When time does heal old wounds. Emotional pain will not last forever. While it’s true that deep scars can be left behind, the intense pain associated with the trauma does tend to wane and yield to time.
When the hole created by the pain begins to be filled-in with love and grace, hope begins to seep through until its healing presence can at least start working on the edges as it gradually moves more towards the core.


Forgiveness. Forgiveness provides hope for a new start. To forgive is to let go of the anger, shame and resentment that is keeping you stuck in the pain and in the past. Providing forgiveness does not condone the circumstance – it just provides a way to move pass it.
To be clear, the act of forgiveness is a gift you give yourself. The root word give in the word forgiveness reminds us that when we forgive we give ourselves hope for a new beginning.

Change. Change allows us to redefine and reinvent ourselves. When we are open to change, we are given the opportunity to see things differently and to do things differently.
We change in order to grow. Real growth, however, can occur incrementally. Meaning we don’t have to change everything about ourselves or our lives all at once, we just need to begin changing some things – a little at a time.

Decisions bring about change and change brings about growth and growth brings hope. So, begin by making a few new decisions, new choices, about how you want to live the rest of your life and feel the hope as it begins to swell inside of you.

Do something good every day. Inspiration can be found in the oddest places. One morning last week I was in a Starbucks getting my morning charge when I noticed the statement, “Do something good every day,” hand printed on a chalkboard underneath the menu. Starbucks is running this campaign over the holiday season by donating 5 cents (on select products) to the Global Fund to help save lives in Africa.
Do something good every day doesn’t just have to be a temporary marketing campaign, it can also be a daily mantra if we choose to remember its challenge. By doing something good every day we can choose to bring hope to people we know and to people we don’t know. I think by doing so, we will bring hope to ourselves, too.

Love will continue forever. In my article, How to Love Consciously, I write:

There will be a day when I no longer share this life with Mary Beth. When that day arrives, my hope is she will know my intent was to discover exactly what she wanted and my conscious choice was to give her more of that.

The article was written from the point-of-view of how to love someone with whom we are sharing a life right now. The next phase of love is the stage that will last forever. The choices we make today will impact and shape what that eternal love will be like.

When love is given without conditions, and it is returned authentically, we can have hope the love will continue forever.

When we understand that we are enough I am enough. If I never make a gazillion dollars, I’m still enough. If I never write a best-selling book, I’m still enough. If I never achieve every dream and goal I have, I’m still enough.
I’m enough because each day I try to be the best parent, husband, friend, employee and world citizen I can be.

Please don’t get me wrong, I stumble through most days replete with mistakes. I miss opportunities to connect with my children, I irritate Mary Beth and I foul-up plenty of other things as well. But, at the end of the day, a gentle peacefulness layered with feelings of hope settles over me because I understand that I don’t have to be perfect, or try to be perfect any longer, I just have to be Alex and that’s more than enough.

The day after Christmas will be a busy one. It will be on a Friday and most folks will have the day off from work. The malls and shopping centers will be packed with shoppers eager to return or exchange gifts that didn’t seem to fit or just didn’t feel good enough to wear.

There’s a good chance my family will be in the crowd, too. The sweaters, boots and jeans we unwrapped the day before will be scrutinized to see if they are the right style; are in the perfect color and just the right size. If necessary, these gifts will be offered up for things we like better.

The gifts that give us hope, on the other hand, do not need a return policy. These gifts are crafted for each one of us and if we give ourselves permission to try them on, we will see how well they fit and how good they feel.

Before You Die...

Five Secrets You Must Discover Before You Die

by Alex Blackwell @ the BridgeMaker

We do not have to wait until we are old to become wise. We can discover these secrets at any age and the sooner we discover them, the more fulfilling our lives will be.” – John Izzo, Ph.D

What makes life worth living? How can we live in a meaningful and joyous way? Do we need to fear death? Dr. John Izzo addresses these questions in his latest book The Five Secrets You Must Discover Before You Die.

In the book, Izzo not only shares these concepts, but he illustrates them by telling the stories of the extraordinary people he interviewed. In addition, he developed a series of questions that readers can ask themselves to help integrate the secrets into their lives.

These secrets are inspiring and provide a good blueprint or roadmap, for all of us to use in our journey of finding happiness and our life’s purpose. The following is a brief synopsis of each secret:

*Be True to Yourself.* You must follow your heart and your dreams, not the dreams someone else has for you. This may mean making a radical change in your life, or simply making small adjustments. The key to continually examine your life is to make sure you are following your own true path.

Questions to ask yourself: Did this week or day feel like my kind or week/day? What would make tomorrow or next week feel more true to myself?

*Leave No Regrets.* Although all of the people whom Izzo interviewed had some regrets, people who had the fewest were the happiest. A common theme, he discovered, is that people don’t regret risks that failed; instead they regretted not having risked more.

Questions to ask yourself: Did I act on my convictions this week? How am I responding to the setbacks in my life right now? Am I stepping forward or retreating?

*Become Love.* The more you focus on acting with love, the more you will find happiness, says Izzo. This begins with choosing to love yourself and breaking away from thoughts that are self-defeating and self-critical. You must make loving relationships a priority in your life.

Questions to ask yourself: Did I make room for friends, family and relationships today or this week? Did I spread love and kindness in the world at each interaction?

*Live the Moment.* Living the moment means living your life now rather than simply planning it. “We must always live in the present moment, the only moment in which we have any power,” writes Izzo.

Questions to ask yourself: Did I fully enjoy whatever I was doing this day/week? What am I grateful for right now?

*Give More Than You Take.* Each day you have the power to give without limit. Izzo’s interviews reveal that people long to make a contribution. Giving connects people to something larger than themselves – whether it’s a supreme being of the entire human experience and journey.

Questions to ask yourself: Did I make the world a better place this week in a small? Was I kind, generous, giving this week? How can I be more that way tomorrow?

Perhaps the most important message to take away from The Five Secrets You Must Discover Before You Die is that it’s never too late to start leading a meaningful life. Age doesn’t matter. All you need is the knowledge and the will to change.

A frequent message on The BridgeMaker is to not allow shame, regret or fear keep you from creating the life that you want. No matter what the past holds, it is the past. Life is about moving forward; about living a life that resonates with truth and purpose. Dr. John Izzo’s The Five Secrets You Must Discover Before You Die is a good resource for the journey.

...it´s about how hard you can get hit, and keep moving forward...

Nine ways to keep moving forward in life

by Alex Blackwell @ the BridgeMaker

"Around here we don’t look backwards for very long. We keep moving forward, opening up new doors and doing new things.” – Walt Disney

Life can hit hard. Sometimes you get knocked down when you don’t even see it coming. Some are cheap shots, some are glancing blows and some can bring you to your knees. When this happens, it’s not about how hard you get hit; it’s about how hard you can get hit, but still find the strength to keep moving forward. It’s about having the will to continue in spite of the obstacles.
It is interesting where inspiration can be found at times. Our son, Andrew, received the Rocky Series for Christmas. This DVD set contains all six Rocky movies. Over the holidays, I had an opportunity to watch the last movie in the series, Rocky Balboa, with my son. The movie contains a very poignant scene between Rocky and his son. The message Rocky delivers is one of hope, courage and determination when life hits hard:





This scene is a great reminder that character is not defined by what happens to you, but rather by how you react to what happens to you. When you get hit, do you stay down? Or do you reach down somewhere deep inside of you and pull up the courage that lifts you back on your feet to keep moving forward? You do have a choice. Consider these Nine Ways to Keep Moving Forward when you are faced with this choice again.

Forget Regret
Leave your mistakes and regret in the past. They don’t define your value, then or now. When you stay in the past you become stuck and unable to move forward. We all have made mistakes with our job choices, friends and relationships. The consequences can hit us pretty hard. However, to begin learning how to put these experiences behind us – by letting them go, we can begin to live in the here and now. Give yourself the gift of forgiveness and keep moving forward.

Learn from Failure
Learning from failure and having regret are two separate things. Regret is an emotion; a feeling of disappointment along with a modest amount of shame or guilt. But to look back at a circumstance and figure out what went wrong gives you some very important information. This review allows you to evaluate what worked and what didn’t, and more importantly, why. Often when you are removed from a situation, you can look at it more objectively which will allow you to make better choices to keep moving forward.

Ask for Help
You are not alone. It may feel that way sometimes, but there are many people who would extend their hand and lift you up if asked. All you have to do is ask. Consider co-workers, neighbors, or your church. Often times we are afraid to ask because we don’t believe we are worthy to receive the help. Think about this: we are surrounded by millions and millions of people by design - for a purpose. A hand to grasp, a shoulder to cling, and a face to radiate hope can help you to keep moving forward.


Believe You are Worthy
Whatever your goal, your dream, or your desire, you are worthy of achieving it. The closer you get to it is when the enemy of you soul will begin putting doubt in your mind by playing the self-limiting tapes that say you are not worthy. Replace these old tapes with a newer one that contains the truth – you are worthy to have your heart’s true desire and to keep moving forward.

Take 100% Responsibility
Except in rare and unfortunate circumstances, you are responsible for the quality and condition of your life. Your career, your relationships and your happiness are all under your direct control. Sometimes we choose to do nothing when we get hit hard because it’s just easier and less painful that way. But the real pain is only deferred. You have to live with yourself. You have to live with the voice in your gut, your inner wisdom, that says you gave up too soon or didn’t try hard enough. When you hear this inner voice speaking to you, it’s usually right. It’s your choice, then, to get up and keep moving forward.

Know What You Want
This isn’t about the how, only the what. In order to move forward in life, you need a firm foundation to step from. Understanding what and where you want to go in life will provide your vision and spirit – your foundation. The how will figure itself out when you know you want to keep moving forward.

Trust
There are no accidents without value. When you get hit hard and land on your back, look for the reasons and for the value in this. Open your heart and trust this happened for a reason. Perhaps it was to test your determination or to alert you to the fact you were on the wrong path. Either way, trust the experience is happening for a reason and be open to making adjustments in order to keep moving forward.

Want it More
How badly do you want it? How badly do you really want to achieve what you are working so hard to accomplish? When you get hit hard, you have an opportunity to answer this question. It’s one thing to say you want to do something, or to be something. But to walk through the pain; to get up and keep moving forward knowing there may be more pain ahead, is a test of your determination and resolve. When you find yourself getting back on your feet, you have indeed answered this question and there’s no doubt you will keep moving forward.

Keep the Faith
Faith: A strong belief in something without proof or evidence
At the end of the day when you are weary from all of the effort and energy you have expended and you are sore and tired from being hit hard so many times, but the dream is not realized, the one thing that tells you to keep going; to get up tomorrow and to keep moving forward, is your faith. Honor this and cherish it. Faith is what makes you human. It gives you energy and hope. And if you let it, your faith will deliver you to wherever you want to go in life.

and about pain...

The purpose of pain

by Alex Blackwell @ the BridgeMaker

Emotional pain, like physical pain, can tell you something. Although not pleasant and very uncomfortable to endure, the pain you have suffered in your life can create tremendous value and purpose if you allow it to do so.

Last Friday night Mary Beth and I were driving home from a rare dinner alone. The topic of our parents came up. We both struggle with certain aspects of how we were raised as children. My wife and I are still healing some wounds that were inflicted many years ago.

The purpose of today’s post is not to bash my parents. I strongly believe that my parents, and my wife’s parents, did not consciously or deliberately set out to cause either one of us pain. But our reality suggests that the adults we are today, for better or for worse, is a product of the pain we experienced as children.

During the drive home from the restaurant, I wondered if my life would be different, perhaps a little better, if my parents had provided a more nurturing and structured environment. Mary Beth quickly reminded me that it is because I didn’t have the financial resources or the guidance to guide me into making appropriate choices that has ultimately led me to my success.

Simply put, it is because I had to rely on my own tenacity; I had to develop a strict work ethic; and I had develop personal accountability and a set of goals to motivate and inspire me are the reasons I have what I have today and I am who I am today.

I’m far from perfect, but I do know how to survive and keep moving forward in life in spite of the obstacles, and pain, I encounter.

Pain is a compass

Pain can serve as a compass to point us in new directions and new opportunities. Typically, we tend to avoid a circumstance, a person, or a type of a person, if it has caused us pain in the past.

Making these adjustments contributes to our personal development and growth and helps to develop new-found confidence when the adjustments we make lead to better, less painful, and more gratifying results.

Pain shapes our character

Living in a house with an alcoholic parent forced me to learn to adapt. I had to learn, from an early age, to set my expectations low but to place my ambitions high. My purpose became to survive and to create a life that would break the cycle for my children.

Sometimes in life it’s not what happens to you that define your character, it’s how you respond to what happens to you that define your character.

Our darkest days create our most courageous moments

Just as there are not accidents without value, the pain we feel can pave the way to developing a more courageous and confident spirit. When we get hit, really hard, and fall to our knees in despair, but somehow summon the strength to rise and face the challenge again, we become smarter and we become stronger for the next round.

I’m a big fan of the movie Rocky. In the final scene, Rocky and Apollo Creed come out of their corners and touch gloves for the 15th and final round of the fight.

Creed glares at Rocky and says, “You’re going down.”

Rocky looks backs at Creed and simply states, “No, no way.”

After enduring 14 rounds of punishment and pain, Rocky was determined not to give up. For him, victory meant to be standing when the final bell rang. He knew he would not win the fight with Creed, but he was really fighting a completely different fight - he was fighting the demons in his mind that kept telling him he was just a bum.

He used his pain, both past and present, as a compass to motivate him and provide the confidence he needed to endure the last round. He ended the fight still on his feet.

The purpose of pain is to remind us we are alive. If we will allow it, pain can provide the foundation to live a life of courage and determination. The memories of pain, and knowing we can survive, will help keep us on our feet, too.